Which is why I’m issuing this reminder to men and to women who care about them: Tank tops are not shirts. and men should not wear them in public.
I believe that in polite society, certain items of apparel are best worn in private. Pajama pants come to mind. As does lingerie. And now, thanks to a spell of hot weather and the general laziness that comes with the end of summer, tank tops for men.
You want to wear your tank top to the beach or in your own backyard? Fine.
On stage at the strip club? Of course.
And if your name is Lenny Kravitz, you have carte blanche because the truth is you look good in everything.
Otherwise, do not be influenced by the whims of high-end fashion designers who are showing tank tops for men in their collections.Ê Ann Demeulemeester, for example, is selling one for $335 at Barneys New York, www.barneys.com.
With low necklines and drooping arm holes, tank tops – or if you prefer, wife beaters – are sloppy, ultra-revealing and just plain unappealing to the rest of us.
There’s the armpit hair situation. I will admit to cringing at the sight of the sleeveless man I saw in the grocery store the other day, imagining him reaching for a peach piled high on display, only to skim the rest of them with his armpit hair. It is not something I want to see near food.
A coworker presented me with another mental image I can’t seem to shake when he said:Ê What if your hairdresser was wearing a tank top? All that stuff would be in your face.
And then there’s the breast situation. Tank-top-wearing men of a certain size are prone to side boob; it is not a pretty sight. And as my coworker points out, tank tops are nip slips waiting to happen and who wants to see some stranger’s hairy nipple?
So I’m saying to men what people, myself included, say to women all of the time: Cover up.
And remember, most guys look great in a plain white T-shirt.
Now tell me, what do you think?
Contact Georgea Kovanis: 313-222-6842 or gkovanis@freepress.com. Follow her on Twitter @georgeakovanis.
ÊÊÊ